So I did it. I quit the fandoms that I was part of.

Anyone who said “you can only quit fandom when you’re dead” has clearly not met me.

None of this was out of malice though, and I want to make that abundantly clear.

I realized that fandom participation, even — perhaps especially — amongst those who shared common television shows or pairings with me was becoming increasingly more detrimental to my mental health. Being an admin on a Supernatural fandom and meta server, and doing the things that come with that and were supposed to bring me joy and satisfaction, was becoming increasingly more detrimental to my mental health. Something that was supposed to bring me joy and satisfaction was making me depressed and sad. I decided that I would no longer engage in things that actively contributed to these states of mind, so I “tendered” my resignation from fandom as a whole, quit Discord servers related to said fandoms, and exited Facebook groups for the same. This was kind of like what I did when Bub was like… all of two years old, I was active in fandoms, and then I decided that I didn’t want to participate in them so I simply dropped off of their maps and wasn’t really missed (which made me happy because I didn’t want to draw attention to myself doing this, although my presence in recent fandoms was such that I didn’t have a choice with it).

I don’t want to be asked questions about this or told that I could have handled matters differently.

In fact, I am actually already feeling better, so I know that this decision was the right one for me to make.

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