04
May
2021

The state can stop playing these games now.

categories: personal; word count: 411 words

Normally, as part of some of the state benefits that we receive, cooperation with child support is mandatory.

You have to let them at least attempt to enforce a child support order if one is on file.

However, if there is any risk to the child(ren) or you that could come about as a result of this, you can get what’s called a good cause waiver against enforcement, and having one of these means that any child support order your child or children have will not be enforced as part of “cooperation” to get state benefits. My oldest son’s case has had a good cause waiver on it for nearly the entire time that he has had a finalized custody order because there absolutely is no safe way to attempt to enforce child support — the one time the state accidentally did, which is a story in and of itself and part of the reason that I am making this post, he quit his job in retaliation, and I was made aware of the fact that he… retaliated in and of itself when he did this. When this happened, it was also made clear to me that behavior from Bub’s paternal family met the criteria for emotional abuse with the risk of it becoming physical abuse “if provoked”, and a good cause waiver was placed on his child support case as well. As time went on, it was also stated that it should have qualified for one from the start, because the behavior from Bub’s paternal family was never… not there.

Anyway.

The only thing is that when these state benefits are renewed, the cases temporarily open and have to be closed back out by the child support office. This isn’t even a thing that should be happening. It’s gotten to the point that if my sons’ names cross the desk over there, their cases are immediately closed back out, and sometimes the child support office contacts Health and Human Services (HHSC) over them being “referred”, complete with the good cause waivers, in the first place. The child support office even went so far as to file motions with the court terminating their office’s assignment to both cases so that if HHSC “accidentally” refers them, they can’t work them. All they can do is close them out. The cases are not in their jurisdiction.

We shouldn’t be playing the game of “close them back out every time benefits are renewed” though.

02
May
2021

Since we are still medicating this thing…

categories: personal; word count: 200 words

Since I don’t think I’ve mentioned it here, my primary care doctor referred me to a wound care clinic. Through that, we found out that I am allergic to the adhesive in Tegaderm (and no, WordPress, that is not “megadeath”), so I had to be given… something that’s slightly different, a bit itchier once it stays on my skin for a long enough period of time, but not entirely bad. I was also put on two different antibiotics, and predictably at high doses, because of the severity of this wound. If side effects from these continue I’m going to be calling, or conversing with, the wound care clinic before the fourteen days are up that I’m supposed to spend on the longer of the two and asking if I can just be put on IV antibiotics. Apparently you can do those at home if you’re competent enough to manage your own care, and I would like to give doing those a try.

As the generation Z kids say, I have regrets about this wound care clinic… to include the fact that they do not prescribe pain medication that is not lidocaine for wounds even when the wounds clearly need medicating.

01
May
2021

Hexennacht passed. I wanted to mention this.

categories: personal; word count: 365 words

I know I’ve mentioned this, but this holiday pays homage to those who were victimized by superstition.

Bub’s father and his grandmother on that side of the family attempted to coerce me into converting to Catholicism, even going so far as to rush me into filling out forms for RCIA (Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults). I was never once asked how I felt about religion, or their religion. Not once was I asked if I even wanted to convert to their religion. To this day, I still remember something that Bub’s paternal grandmother said to me — “everyone has their own journey to God”, or something to that effect. No, you just expected me to roll over and die, to convert to your family’s religion because it was your family’s religion because you were going to use it as the battering ram to control me, then you were going to use it as the means to shotgun wed me to your son to “erase the sin of our child being born out of wedlock”, and then you expected me to have child after child that I did not want because your religion forbade contraception. And when I died, as I would have due to the health concerns that I had that would have caused pregnancy to imperil me, “it would have been God’s will”, because all you would have seen me as would have been your son’s incubator.

Not once was I asked if I even wanted to attend the Masses and church functions that I was literally drug to.

I told your son that I did not want to attend these things, that I did not want to convert, and look where that got me. Look exactly how far that got me, until I outed myself to your (deacon? priest? pastor?), and the people that I needed to out myself to in order to extricate myself from the whole situation. I shouldn’t have needed to go nuclear to be treated with a modicum of decent human respect, and I should have been asked about these things long before it got to that point. I was victimized by everything that led up to that point…

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