I can’t believe that I have never mentioned this here.

One of the most hilarious things that I like to recount to people is the fact that as high school progressed, I made myself into such a Mean Girl that people actually compared me to Regina George from it for years. On the outside, at high school, I was conceited and preppy. I was popular and sociable. I had learned how to work the system at my high school to my success while managing to have a completely separate personality outside of it, being a gamer and a geek when I wasn’t actually in school — I didn’t want the people that I went to school with to know about, or have anything to do with, that side of me, and I was more than content to continue working the system exactly as I’d just previously described. Looking back on things, they were hilarious by the time that I’d given birth to my oldest son… I had cut everyone from my graduating class out of my life, and in a few years I would manage to cut all but one person that attended my high school out of my life as well simply because I did not want to continue to have to put that charade up. I made it clear that I did not want to attend, or even be invited to, any class reunions or anything related to the time I spent in high school. That would go on to be honored, which made me happy even though I’m still technically searchable on sites like Facebook… but I mean, there is a block list that I can use if needed, which is great.

However, I still suppose that I have some of that Mean Girl inside of me. It’s like the whole “two wolves” allegory or analogy or whatever… there’s a part of me that loves clothes, pink, and can be or come off as brash and conceited, and then there’s a geekier part of me. I’m not entirely a nice person, and I own up to that. I’d say that I’m mostly nice (and some people might say that I’m completely nice until, or unless, they see that part of me), but I know that I’m not actually completely nice. And I am completely okay with that.

Leave a Reply