December 2021 archive

I get the weirdest spam comments on this…

Meanwhile, I am still continuing to fight the state to get disability. This most recent denial made it evident that the people in charge of deciding whether or not I “am disabled” (hint: I am) did not even read the doctor’s notes that they asked my pain management clinic for on two separate occasions. My pain management clinic has literally been nothing but supportive of me filing for disability, but they make this the most difficult in the world to access with the most asinine rules and regulations that they themselves do not even adhere to. At this point, if my reconsideration is denied, I am seriously consider looking into one of those lawyers that only takes some of your backpay if you win the case — this wasn’t something that I wanted to do because these are more appointments that I’m going to have to make to see the lawyer, and this is something that I’m going to have to put even more time and effort into, but the current system of disability we have is causing disabled people to go without needed care and to die. I’ve actually known (of, depending on who you’re talking about) a few people — as in, more than one — who have died of their disabilities because Social Security continually kept denying them hoping that it could save itself some money by not having to pay out on another case. I knew someone who was diagnosed with aggressive cancer who finally got awarded disability at the hearing level, and then he died of that cancer two days later, which meant that all of his backpay had to be given back to the state. This was money that he had deemed eligible for, but due to disability laws, because he passed away all of it had to be remanded back to the state… which means that they ultimately lost themselves no money by denying him and denying him until his cancer killed him.

I knew someone whose mother had to attend like… four hearings for them, and at the fourth hearing they were approved for disability, but the backpay only went so far back since this was like the fourth hearing.

I knew of someone who died in her sleep waiting for her hearing to come up, having been denied twice.

My second neurologist had to field denials for two of his patients who had conditions that were going to kill them. His nearly exact words to me were, “Lou-Gehrig’s doesn’t get better. You die from it. And the state persisted in claiming that this individual was “no longer disabled”, so they tried to deny his benefits on CDR.”

The disability “system” as it exists in the United States needs to be overhauled, drastically, and soon.

Yesterday was baby burrito’s actual due date!

The OB that I had for that pregnancy kept “insisting” that it was December 2nd in spite of the fact that I have thirty-day cycles and Monster’s femur length proved that it was December 4th, but I don’t exactly trust the person who couldn’t bother to screen me for domestic violence for shit. He was actually surprised when he asked about the father of my child at my first postpartum appointment and I responded, “He’s in jail right now,” because he was literally sitting in jail as that appointment was taking place. Needless to say, I found myself another OB when I found out that I was pregnant with Bub, and I would have kept him as my OB/GYN were it not for the fact that if I do get pregnant again (and decide to keep it, because “threat to maternal life” still qualifies me for an abortion under Texas laws such that they are), the doctor that I see for my Depo-Provera shots is skilled in high-risk prenatal care and… yeah, I would definitely need that, heh.

It’s not like I’m going to stop this any time soon.

For several years, I’ve kept my online life almost completely separate from my real life.

And the “almost” is a technicality that I’m about to get to regarding who I have friended on Facebook.

On Facebook, I have a variety of filters that I use depending on people’s interests, but the filters are also set up in such a way that I can easily separate those that I have friended on it who I know in real life and those who I know over the Internet. For instance, I don’t have any friends in real life who would be interested in a fandom, or fandoms, and feel that it’s better to exclude them from posts that I make related to the fandoms that I am part of. If I want to post something that I’d be far more comfortable with real-life friends of mine reading, I filter them into the post and my Internet friends out of it. This works as well as it does because I post next to nothing public. The only things that I post that are public are non-profit fundraisers such as the annual birthday one and Giving Tuesday stuff, which you don’t appear to have a choice in… I mean, not unless that has changed between now and a few days ago when I posted a non-profit fundraiser for Claire’s Place. If it has, please let me know. As for my Twitter, it’s relegated to people that I know (and would like to follow) online since I don’t appear to have that many real-life friends who even use the site. Last time I checked, I didn’t have any. All of them were on Facebook. However, having a place where I can discuss fandom with people that are on that same level has been nice — I also went a step further and made it so that it’s not searchable by anyone who does know me in real life just to continue to keep the two apart.

On Facebook, my friends’ list (and number of mutual friends, I want to say) is not visible to anyone but me.

Of course, none of this is against the people that I know in real life… but like I’ve said, the things that I have in common with them are different from the things that I have in common with Internet friends. A lot different.

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