Posts Tagged ‘disability’

02
Aug
2024

In hindsight, I should have expected this to happen.

categories: computer gaming, personal; word count: 204 words

I’m not sure what happened to Bub’s new computer last night, but I wound up having to reload half of it.

I am just now finishing up loading his games back onto it with it continuing to be hooked into the modem.

In the interim, I’ve been having more episodes of strabismus that normally coincide with me being at risk for having an epileptic seizure… except for the fact that they’re not happening (when I’m conscious, at any rate), but I am having a harder time focusing my eyes on things and feel more pressure in my head that is very distinctly not migraine pain. To be honest, I’m not sure I want to make a trade-off like this given what it sounds like it could be, because even the best of scenarios for symptoms like these are worse than anything else I currently have to deal with. The eye deviations happen when my glasses are on and when they are off, and I’ve begun to notice some asychronity in my pupillary sizes as well as rapid dilation and widening when I am in a stable light source. Some days, and times, are worse than others. But still. Can I not deal with this?

30
Jul
2024

Dealing with the state is fun, and by that I mean…

categories: personal; word count: 211 words

So I found out the other day that I may actually be eligible for survivor’s benefits off of my oldest son’s father’s record, because our mutually shared son is disabled which negates the age and length of marriage requirement normally imposed on these benefits. It also means that as long as I exercise parental control over my son, to include managing his affairs once he becomes an adult, I am and should remain eligible for these benefits without interruption as long as I do not remarry. This wasn’t something that was originally brought up when I applied for survivor’s benefits on my oldest son’s behalf, seeing as how it was his father who had died. But since there remains this as a possibility, I’ve tried to get in touch with the state to ask about it to see if these benefits can be instated to me. Dealing with the government is always fun, though… and by that, what I really mean to say is not fun. This is something that should have been explored months ago when the application was first filed and information on our household was collected, but it was not.

I expect the state to slow-walk this as they have almost everything I’ve needed their assistance for, though.

28
Jul
2024

Absolutely none of this surprises me now.

categories: personal; word count: 74 words

I’ve had a migraine for six days now that Fioricet has not touched, and Fioricet… usually does.

At the very least, it helps, enough for me to be seen by a member of my care team.

This is also the longest period of time in which I have had an active migraine in, well, ever.

If this doesn’t break sometime tomorrow, I’ll be asking my care team what they want me to do next.

14
Jun
2024

Somehow I nearly managed to forget to post in this.

categories: personal; word count: 244 words

Things happen. Life happens. I’m going to be asking my psychiatrist to put me back on guanfacine, because months of Straterra (or however you spell it)… aren’t working. I have to put Post-It notes on my wall to remember to take the medication. It’s not working anywhere near as well as guanfacine did. And the whole point of ADHD medication is to allow you to be more attentive and less forgetful, which clearly is not happening in this case here. I aspire to fix this in about a month when I see my psychiatrist for a check-in.

A… friend of Bub’s father contacted me now that I’ve unblocked the majority of them to see what they would do, which I initially had mixed feelings over. But then we got to talking, and I told him some things that I intend on mentioning here at some point for the first time, and he understood where I was coming from when I understandably “took (Bub) and ran (from his father)”. There are some things that I want to get off of my chest after his upcoming birthday for the sake of doing so, even if that means “going public”, because all of it is the truth substantiated by my medical records. There’s so much that he took from me in 2009 that I intend on taking back. I want to tell the story of… what happened, and I want to do all of this on my terms.

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