Posts Tagged ‘disability’

I mean, I feel like I should post an update to this.

The pinched nerve in my back is… strangely back, and I’m waiting for NSAIDs with Benadryl to help.

Maybe they will. Maybe they won’t. At the least it became something to try because of how bad the pain is.

In the meantime, I’m submitting my family’s wish lists to the wish list sites that I’ve participated in for I don’t even know how many years any more. I may link the sites here for people who may want to utilize them, as there are people who only really use the blog site they’re on to participate in this wish list gifting (what do you call it? is there a more formal name for it?) who otherwise do not participate on the site. I’ll probably also compile and post our wish lists up here as well for people that read my blog, as there are some people who I know do that and don’t participate in other blogging sites. This has become a lot of fun and I simply love it!

I see that we are on two days of regretting this.

The good news is that the back pain that I had for… whatever reason has more or less gone away, for which I’m thankful. I will probably still have that looked at and ask about it when I see my local pain management clinic for my migraines, and I have a standard appointment for that coming up. I see no reason why not to…

What we’re currently dealing with is reactive airways from deep cleaning half of the house, which I do approximately every four months. I think I’m going to bite the bullet on this one and have someone else do it, because my lungs can not handle even the tamest of cleaning products. I have been coughing virulently for two days now, this being the second, and although my cough is better than it was the day before this isn’t something that I accidentally want to walk into again, even though I was wearing a N95 mask to do this, which I always do when cleaning anything. Even though the medication that I take for heart problems has cured almost all of my asthma, sometimes I forget that I actually do still have it to some degree and that my airways can become really reactive when exposed to the wrong thing, even when other people are able to be exposed to it just fine. I think that’s the kicker. I’ve been taking the benzonatate that I’ve been prescribed by my pulmonologist to stop most of the coughing, which has surprisingly worked really well, and started taking Benadryl because my face began to swell yesterday and I swear that I have never had that happen.

At one point, when it was so bad that I could not sleep, I coated my throat in the lidocaine gel that I had been prescribed for the mouth injury that I had awhile back, which you can do (the label even instructs you on how to do it if you need to). That really helped as well, and I think I’m just going to keep doing that from time to time until this subsides or I bite the bullet again and have to see a doctor over this. Everyone else in this house is predictably fine. It’s just me that’s usually sitting here, sometimes laying down, coughing and…

This is one of the things that I hate about Texas.

Don’t get me wrong. I hate almost everything about this state. But I hate this the most.

I hate the fact that I’ve had to make progressively more difficult decisions over the years to ensure that my disabled family gets and retains access to benefits and services that we need. I hate the fact that we’ve had to fight for approval on some of those as hard as we’ve had to, even though the majority of that seems to be focused on me and my own struggles (though I would rather being the one to have to fight for these things and not either of my children, even though I am as deserving as they are of these benefits and services)…

There are a lot of things I hate about the federal disability system, but even more that I hate about Texas.

In hindsight, I should have expected this to happen.

I’m not sure what happened to Bub’s new computer last night, but I wound up having to reload half of it.

I am just now finishing up loading his games back onto it with it continuing to be hooked into the modem.

In the interim, I’ve been having more episodes of strabismus that normally coincide with me being at risk for having an epileptic seizure… except for the fact that they’re not happening (when I’m conscious, at any rate), but I am having a harder time focusing my eyes on things and feel more pressure in my head that is very distinctly not migraine pain. To be honest, I’m not sure I want to make a trade-off like this given what it sounds like it could be, because even the best of scenarios for symptoms like these are worse than anything else I currently have to deal with. The eye deviations happen when my glasses are on and when they are off, and I’ve begun to notice some asychronity in my pupillary sizes as well as rapid dilation and widening when I am in a stable light source. Some days, and times, are worse than others. But still. Can I not deal with this?

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