Posts Tagged ‘disability’

In case anyone’s been wondering where it went…

https://www.patreon.com/project_p3ol

I know that I used to mention this project in here when I participated in it, but as a content creator for Twitch (well, when I resume), there isn’t really any way for me to participate in things that aren’t abandonware who don’t fall under the fair use project and… have that continue to fly. I’m not sure why they named it what they did, but it wouldn’t have been anything that I would have been able to stream without opening myself up to at least the possibility of one or more copyright, or content, strikes… and that wasn’t something that I was willing to do with my own account, not when I realized it. (If I’m ever put into the position where I have to decide whether or not to support something like this, I have to ask myself if it’s abandonware or if it falls under the fair use act, and if it doesn’t… I’m choosing Twitch, and my Twitch account, over me participating.)

The funny thing about all of this is that I had a lead on one of the source code books that the developers were looking for, but when the person who might have a copy of it was made aware… why a copy of it was being sought out, they weren’t supportive of the idea, and that is something that I just have to respect…

At some point I intend on resuming streaming, but I’m waiting for a few more health-related things to fall together — or not to fall together — before I jump back in. I should know for sure in the coming months.

The equivalent of a subtweet, but in blog form.

If you can’t be considerate enough to be direct enough with me to tell me how much you want me to correspond with you, and how you want me to correspond with you, you can’t — or at least, you shouldn’t, but if you’re reading this you should be able to tell how that went — blame me, as an autistic person, for not knowing how much you want me to correspond with you, or in what way. But I’m not going to play into any attempts you may make to manufacture drama. If you’ve decided that you no longer want to be friends with me, it is what it is. I’m not going to fight with you, or “hard chat” you, or… whatever it is that people who used to use America Online, who have since migrated over to Discord, are now doing. As I’ve said more than once, I am too old for drama. I don’t have time for drama. I can spare the occasional thought in regards to it, and maybe a blog post whenever something happens, but aside from that I’m not going to carve out time in my life or my schedule for this sort of thing beyond those parameters. I will not give myself to drama any further.

Times like these make me regret the fact that my mother let the computer babysit me as I grew up. I learned a lot of functional skills from it, but still. Things like this almost make the whole thing in general not worth it.

I’m old enough to make some of these jokes now.

One of the things that I love doing is monitoring my credit. It’s different in the different bureaus (which is, as I know, to be expected), but within the different… scoring models, is also different there, and when you have a sense of humor like mine, that can get amusing. Oh, why can’t all of these be the same? Why can’t there be just one credit score? (I know, I know. Seriously, I know. I’m old enough to joke and lament about this now.)

On to things that are very much not actual jokes now, though…

It still hits hard that Jason David Frank is actually gone, and why he is gone. I’ve still been trying as hard as I can not to actually talk about the cause of his death, which has been confirmed, because I don’t want to throw that into people’s faces — I don’t want to cause them distress or trigger them, so I leave it at the fact that yes, he has regrettably passed away. I did get the chance to watch the celebration of life that his loved ones allowed to be livestreamed on his official Facebook fan page, though. In the interim (November 22nd, to be exact), I’ve begun to develop almost excruciating back pain — sciatica — that I began treating with prednisone, which it was really rather responsive to, but I know that I can’t stay on prednisone forever due to the side effects… so it returned within about a day and a half of me stopping prednisone, and my care team has become aware of this. If sciatica came about due to the frequent prednisone use I’ve needed due to asthma and migraines, this would not surprise me at all, though… but this has become painful. I hate pain.

I can’t say that it’s not par for the course, but…

I’ve been continuing to have… worsening symptoms of migraines, so that’s being managed.

Why that suddenly decided to get worse after being stable for the longest time, I’m still not quite sure.

I’m not going to get into much more detail than that about them unless they get so bad that I have to go to the emergency room or become hospitalized for them, and I’ve been told when to present where for them. However, it continues to be a joke for any of those who think that I can hold down a conventional job right now… or at any time in the future based on how things continue to look. This is one of the reasons why I am not streaming right now (well, one of the main reasons if you extrapolate it into the whole health thing…).

I posted about them on Facebook though in the event that emergency room or hospitalization thing happen.

I’d make a quip, but let’s just keep this serious.

Someone came into the child support office on a Saturday, or logged into their child support… whatever on a Saturday, to close both of the boys’ child support cases out because this has been happening since 2014 and should not be at risk of happening or actually happening each time we get our benefits renewed. The “chief ombudsman” of the child support office, Stephanie Neely, (job term used loosely, of course, because if her supervisor had to investigate her when she refused to close my youngest son’s case out at the beginning of the year in spite of repeated good cause waivers being approved until Legal Aid and the National Child Support Agency began to get involved and both HHSC and the OAG began to chicken out, she shouldn’t be in charge of anything and she should know that) e-mailed me to let me know that and apologized “for the stress that this may have put on me”. I shouldn’t have to beg for my children to remain safe while we access state benefits, especially because we take advantage of provisions that safely allow us to access state benefits. And as a matter of fact, as I have since perfectly made clear, I’m not going to beg. You’re going to do your job. If me making you do your job makes you more anxious to deal with me doing your job, you should have thought about that when you tried to make me beg for my youngest son’s safety in… what, December of last year? January of this year? You should have learned quick that the kind of hardball I’m willing to play to keep my children safe from harm isn’t the hardball that the state wants to play, and if that incites fear, again — maybe you should find a different job. As a matter of fact, I actually encourage you to do so. You should never have been put in a position that allowed your daily work to influence children’s lives.

I don’t mind if people come to fear me if it means that I make them do their jobs (or, even better, quit their jobs in some cases), and if it keeps my kids safe from harm, even better. My job as a parent is not to have you like me. My job as a parent is to be my children’s parent, and as it seems in this state, their protector.

That was a slightly hilarious turn of events there…

When I found out that the boys’ child support cases were in the process of being opened by HHSC on Thursday (“with good cause claims upheld”, as I later found out), I filed complaints with the HHSC ombudsman, the child support office, and the National Child Support Agency… and I think it was that last one that managed to get my case attention on a Saturday. I didn’t go to all of the trouble of getting two good cause waivers, one for each of their child support cases, for the state to refuse to allow us to access benefits safely… and as for the reason that Bub’s child support case has a good cause waiver, it’s actually in my medical files even though I don’t think I’ve mentioned it here yet. At any rate, committing to filing those complaints daily until the state resolved this issue really seemed to do the trick, as I was e-mailed — by the “chief ombudsman”, who I had to unblock for purposes of this — letting me know that the cases were closed, the good cause claims were both upheld, and that everything should be back in non-enforcement sitting there by Monday. I should stop comparing my advocacy to Barret Wallace and Katniss Everdeen and just start calling myself a honey badger at this point, because I’m becoming less kind getting done what needs to get done… for the sake of my kids, but also myself. But especially for the sake of my kids. I should still be contacted by the HHSC Ombudsman on Monday, which I expect, because I want to talk about another issue that I’ve been having with the state — it’s the one that has to do with the state manual requiring (or “requiring”) something that is codified nowhere in Texas law because it does not exist in Texas law.

At any rate, I absolutely hate when this happens. It is significantly stressful.

But at least this time it has a good ending… this problem, anyway. I’ll take that. For now.

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