Archive of ‘personal’ category

07
Aug
2020

What I have been doing when I’ve had time…

categories: personal; word count: 305 words

Because of the kindness of the person who set me up the family tree that they did on Ancestry, I’ve… come to the conclusion that the half-aunts (I’m fairly certain that they are my half-aunts now based on their ages, even though Ancestry has both of them pegged as my first cousins) are sisters that my dad has. According to Ancestry, my mother only has one sister, and she might not even be alive any more. So far, neither of these elusive half-aunts have responded to me on Ancestry. I knew going into this that I might be the “hidden relative” to some people because of the holes present in my own family history, so I’m fine with some of the people that I reach out to on these sites, for whatever reason, choosing not to reach out to me.

Meanwhile, there are a few people who actually periodically wonder if I’ve “forgiven my mom yet”, as though one day I will magically do so… so I’d like to bring up the fact that I’ve actually gotten rid of the possessions of mine that she gave me, such as jewelry, if I haven’t already mentioned it here. I find this to be cathartic, and the act of doing so has brought me even more peace. And of course, none of the jewelry that she ever bought me was worth anything monetarily. But it brings me peace not to own anything that she ever bought me as a gift from this point forward, because that is one less reminder that I have of her around the house.

As time has passed, I’ve continued to forget more and more about her, which has been nothing but good.

What she looked like. What she looked like with hair. What she sounded like. Her presence here in my home.

06
Aug
2020

This doesn’t surprise me. It bothers and saddens me.

categories: personal; word count: 392 words

In case anyone’s actually wondering, the schools in this area are set to open up around here in the middle of the month… unless something changes, they open back up and there is a surge of infections directly related to this and the school district gets pie on their faces as a direct result of this (which would not actually surprise me), or there is an actual Hail Mary and someone along the chain of command comes to actual reason. Parents and guardians have the choice of deciding whether to send their students to school for in-person instruction or allowing them to continue doing the distance learning that was mandated back in the middle of last school year when this pandemic started and schools were forced to close down, and any student who is doing distance learning can get a laptop as a loaner from their school at request. Again, this state is prioritizing “the economy” and “getting everything back to normal” over people’s lives, and it shows.

At this point, I can see the school district getting egg on their faces at some point. It’s just a matter of when.

Meanwhile, the superintendent continues to be smug about it, even though members of the board were surprisingly hesitant about it. It seems that the school district is actually in a position to lose funding if they do not open up, and this actually drove the decision to open doors when they are scheduled to be opened. This does not surprise me at all. It will all be about money, and access to federal dollars, at the end of the day. It always is with this district. It will always be about access to federal dollars, and foolish decisions made to secure access to federal dollars, at the end of the day with this district. This is exactly why I called our pompous, smug superintendent a bald-headed fuckface when he was live-streaming about this decision on one of our local news agencies’ Facebook pages, and why I do not regret my decision to call him that at all. I will gladly attach my name to the decision that I made to call him that. He is pompous and smug, and he thinks he knows more than the CDC. He deserves it. He is an educator, not the scientist he thinks he is…

04
Aug
2020

I’ll be damned if this isn’t truth in a picture.

categories: personal; word count: 148 words

This is a screenshot that someone else took that has been disseminating around… but still. This is scary.

And people wonder why teachers are reluctant about being forced to open their classroom doors back up. The United States practically, and with good reason, closed everything down when the pandemic first started, but the economy and “starting everything back up again” now takes precedence when things are so much more worse than they were when the pandemic started. We’re playing with people’s lives here, and people in the highest positions of power do not seem to get that, or worse — they don’t seem to care at all.

I try not to make too many assumptions, but it is beginning to look more and more like “don’t seem to care”.

As I have come to discover, the United States is actually a frightening place to be in a global pandemic.

02
Aug
2020

In which the Internet says, “damn, spoil yourself”.

categories: books, personal; word count: 383 words

You have to love it when you call in a refill for something and are not even told that the medication in question requires prior authorization, wait… wait… wait, and then after more than a week passes call the pharmacist (my favorite line here is “calling to inquire about the status of this medication”), just for the person on the other end of the line to cheerfully say, oh, that medication requires a prior authorization.

At any rate, I did spend some more of the economic stimulus payment. I got a ring light and tripod for our camera (camcorder? camera? yes, I’m a nineties’ child) so that we can actually get more use out of it, and I was actually able to find those two things for affordable prices off of Amazon. As mentioned, I’ve also gotten a few candles as well… one from The Satanic Temple’s actual website itself, a few really nice looking regular-sized candles from a vendor on eBay, a few adorable tealight candles from another vendor, and some Satanic literature. Surprisingly, we were not in dire straights prior to this pandemic, so I decided to use the money from this payment to get things that we would otherwise have had to wait on. As mentioned, I got myself a pair of prescription sunglasses for when I’m having migraines (amber-tinted, and 80% sunglass). I also decided to spoil myself a bit since this pandemic did not actually put us in dire straights at the time that I got the stimulus check given our unique financial situation, although by no means did it make us rich or would I ever have considered us in any way rich or “well-off” from it… I got myself magnetic and thermal nail polish, two things that I’d been wanting for awhile, some other cosmetic items, and some items of clothing.

All told, I didn’t get a lot of things, because this wasn’t a lot of money.

And I would like to see a second stimulus check passed by the government, because there are other things that I would like to get us. I wouldn’t even mind the same amount. I’m not going to get my hopes up with a GOP-controlled Senate or Mitch McConnell. I’m frankly still flabbergasted that I even got the first check, heh.

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