It is definitely not a rollercoaster I want to be on, but here we are.

This happens sometimes, and if you get what I mean, I want it to… stop happening.

With the supplementary medication that I was prescribed after my discharge from the hospital, there have been times where I’ve felt pretty good. There have also been times where I’ve crashed, and where I spend time (since it’s the weekend and all) napping in my bed hoping that this ameliorates. But I know that if I feel worse, or that if I keep feeling worse, to head back up to the hospital… you know, the one that tried to bill me as CPR was being administered on me and I was being paddled and shocked back to life and back to sinus rhythm. Luckily for me I have a great support system that is willing to help me out as I recuperate and get back to health, and I’m thankful for that. I just want these symptoms to stop so that I can get back to my life, get back to doing the things that I love, and spend more time with my kids. Right now, I’ve been spending a bit less time with them because I don’t want them to see me sick and weak, which my support team agrees is completely acceptable. Everyone’s emphasis is on me getting better and me getting back to, well, me…

I managed to pick up the… parcel that I was supposed to pick up while I had pain medication in my system.

Post-sepsis syndrome is a very real thing, and it’s one that I am suffering from.

For me, the main problems are an inability to modulate my temperature, more migraines, and feeling tired, but I am very grateful that I was able to be brought back. At some point I’d like to write about the whole… process of that in as tender a manner I can manage because I feel like it should be written about. I’ve been wanting to resume streaming, and to stream more, but I’ve been exhausted. Apparently this is common when you have sepsis, and when you’re brought back to life for any reason, so I’ll just have to deal with it.