September 2022 archive

I hate being infantilized when I disclose autism.

The title is the biggest banger of all in this post and should pretty much say everything.

What about autism makes people think that it’s a child’s disorder, that only children can have it? These children inevitably do grow up and become adults. More and more adults are getting diagnosed autistic because they have children or family members who are or have (and sometimes significant others who go “hey, I see a lot of myself in you, maybe you’re…”). If I want accommodations, or for people to understand how I am the way I am, it’s best for me to disclose that I am autistic. But if I disclose that I am autistic, some people treat me like I am inferior to them, like I know less than them, or like I’m a child when I am not. They act like I have greater access needs and barriers than I do, and sometimes they do these things in really obvious ways which frustrates me if not infuriates me depending on how they do it. It’s just really frustrating.

Like… don’t get me wrong. I’ve always wondered why my mind seemed to operate differently from that of those around me, so to be diagnosed autistic did not come as a surprise to me at all. Some of my friends who are autistic adults actually told me that they knew I would be diagnosed autistic before I was actually diagnosed on paper. But it seems like adults who aren’t autistic don’t always treat autistic adults with the respect that they deserve as human beings, and that’s got to go before 2030, I swear. I’m that impatient.

Regarding some recent fandom drama I saw…

The only reason that I saw it cross my Twitter timeline was because followers of mine and friends of mine (“moots”) were discussing it or interacting with it to the point that these posts were being elevated and suggested to me… regret number one, I suppose. That was my primary interaction and involvement with it, aside from mentioning that what I did see coming across my timeline made me extremely uncomfortable, continued to make me extremely uncomfortable, and justified why my interaction in fandom-related activities is as close to none as “little to none” can possibly get. I’m well within my rights to find these sort of conversations disconcerting and uncomfortable and want nothing to do with them, which is what I continue to do not participating in fandom experiences — it’s been a boon of mental health for me to have made the decision not to do so (and for my closest friends, such as Andy, was actually something they’d seen coming for months… the less neurotypical in question the friend was, the more they just intuitively understood it).

At this rate, I just hope that fandom as a collective whole continues to leave me alone. I’m not going to watch The Winchesters when it premieres because there’s nothing about it that interests me. If other people want to watch it I’m not going to make them feel bad over it, just as I wouldn’t want to feel bad with my… casual watching of most things (ask me how far I am in The Boys one of these days, I swear), but it’s just not something that I’m interested in. I’m not fascinated by John and Mary’s love story. I know enough about it.

1 4 5 6 7 8 10