May 2021 archive

I shouldn’t have had to fight like this, but…

Enforcement on Bub’s child support case should be, and stay, ceased.

I shouldn’t have had to fight state agencies on this on this like I did, but that was what it came down to. I wound up having to divulge things that I hadn’t really talked about until that point, especially recently… but they were necessary to paint the picture of why enforcement of his child support order would not be safe for either one of us. I wound up having to contact my state’s low-income legal aid service, letting them know what was going on, although I may not need their services if the good cause waiver for his child support case was and stays approved. I’ll be sure to let them know how things are going, or have gone, at the point of our next contact. And having sent an e-mail to one of my state’s HHSC’s internal e-mail accounts also helped expedite matters, but I think I’ve already mentioned beginning to correspond with HHSC’s family violence program specialist. At that point, and at this point, I wasn’t willing to put up with the refusal of a good cause waiver when one had been on his case since 2014, and I didn’t want to have to relive certain… traumatic events that had occurred, even though I wound up having to do exactly that to have new good cause forms filled out (twice for Bub! because the first one that the domestic violence specialist submitted to HHSC was denied, even though approval of those are supposed to be at the discretion of the domestic violence specialist, not HHSC themselves). At the end of the day, I did what I had to do to protect my child.

I did what I had to do to protect myself as well, because I do not need any further interactions with members of my children’s paternal families, and lack of enforcement on their child support orders minimizes this risk.

Back and forth. Back and forth we go.

Someone tells me that the good cause claim for Bub is approved.

Hours later, someone tells me that it’s not because it is primarily against his paternal grandmother.

I left a message with the domestic violence specialist that I’ve been speaking with about submitting another good cause claim implicating Bub’s father, seeing as how he intentionally brought his parents onto my property in late 2010 knowing that they would get violent. This was something that he knew would happen, and he intentionally did it. I don’t want Bub’s father to be blameless in this situation. There is also other information that I hope to supply to the domestic violence specialist about my relationship with Bub’s father that I haven’t spoken about to anyone, because it took me years to realize that it had happened in our relationship. It was something that I didn’t want to think about because I was so focused on raising Bub and Monster, and Bub’s father hadn’t seen him since he was an infant, so it got pushed to the back of my mind where it stayed until it began to become relevant. It’s something that I will mention to the domestic violence specialist if asked about it, if it becomes relevant, which it may. But I’m sick of this back and forth madness.

I hate having been put in the position to protect my children from their other parents, even though it is absolutely necessary in both cases and it is something that I will never hesitate to do. I absolutely hate it.

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