Posts Tagged ‘life’

I mean, I should really have expected this too.

Bub and I are sick with… something. It is not COVID. We’ve tested for COVID with some of the tests that we have here at the house and both of them are negative. If we continue to have concerning symptoms I will have both of us antibody (or is it antigen?) tested. This will be particularly concerning for me if I have it.

I am also continuing to get severe migraines on Lexapro that are only touched by prednisone, and this is not sustainable for long periods of time. I’m starting to wonder if this medication is… just not right for me, because we might have to throw pain medication at it just for me to be able to tolerate it, and then that’s going to start a chain of events that might interact with other medications that I am on that I need to be on.

I have surprisingly made a lot of progress here!

I’ve managed to get past all of the problems that this computer has presented me with so far!

I figured out that the monitor needed a DVI-D cable to DVI-D cable to connect to the desktop, so I went ahead and got one of those since the person who sold me the monitor only sent a VGA cable along with it, and… almost. I mean, they tried. At any rate, I got everything hooked up via USB that needs to be hooked up, and all peripherals appear to be functional. Twitch Studio continues to give me a bit of shit “testing” streaming out, but when I look at the raw stats from the GPU encoder and the computer’s equivalent of an encoder I’m liking what I’m seeing a lot more than I was on the All-in-One computer that we admirably tried to get to stream. (And by that I simultaneously mean “failed miserably to”, especially if you were watching.)

Now all I have to do is reauthenticate ownership of these games we own and I should be almost done!

If it’s not one thing around here, it’s another…

I seem to oscillate between people thinking I am “not severely disabled” and can hold down a conventional job to people thinking that I am so disabled I can’t work at all, and I’ve seen this oscillation happen between a day or two at the least. It’s almost like whiplash. And it’s almost always from able-bodied people, too.

In other news, the cord that I needed to set the gaming computer up has arrived and is functional! I just need to get the Wi-fi adapter that came with the computer to work because it is not working for some reason… all I have to do is get this oe thing fixed and I can begin loading the new computer (which will take some time, and will probably cause no shortage of migraines). That said, I’m getting back to work on loading this thing.

Bub and I are both sick with something not COVID.

Our noses are congested, our throats are sore, we’re both coughing, the whole nine.

I’ve been testing myself for COVID though as needed and am luckily coming back negative on all tests.

So naturally we played Among Us today and this hilariously awesome little gem happened.

Just an overview of parental neglect that I had.

I was probably… last week old when I found out that my mother had gotten me less than a quarter of the recommended shots as a child. I never did the HepB shot series when I was young, and that came out in 1986 and I was born that same year. I never got the chicken pox shot as a child. It seems like she stopped taking me to well visits when I was six years old as per documentation, but at some point I remember the school sending her a nastygram because I was not up-to-date on shots in middle school. She got me those, but she made it clear throughout the entire process that this was the most inconvenient thing ever for her… caring for me was. I never got a single flu shot while I was a minor, and those did come out at around that time, so I easily could have if she had ever been bothered enough to take proper care of me. She did not consent to treatment of large cavities in my front teeth when she did take me to the dentist, and she did not consent for braces to be put on me when I exhibited need for them and my dad made more than enough money for this to be an easily covered expense. She told me, just as she did whenever she wasn’t going to do something for me, “We’re not doing that.” And when I began exhibiting symptoms of depression as an adolescent and told her, she fabricated the lie of “having to wait for something to come in the mail before she could schedule it”. I literally asked her each day for months if “it” had come in the mail yet — finally she just told me the truth, that she was not going to schedule me an appointment to be seen for depression.

When I was in elementary school, it was frequently suggested to her by people who worked with me that I might be neurodiverse with the strong hint there that she should arrange testing for me. Obviously this never happened. (Instead, whenever she got mad at me she would scream in my face “that I had mental problems”. I was a young elementary school student when she did this.) Throughout the time that I spent in school, she frequently had it suggested to her that I get tested for asthma. Because she did not want to do this, she scared me about the test to the point that I was scared to do that and then she used that as an excuse never to get me tested while I was a child. I was just simply told to quit, or not participate in, sports.

This is the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the neglect that my mother foist upon me when I was a child.

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